Dear Owners of The Pit Bull Who Live Two Doors Down From My Grandfather:

I just wanted to take a moment out of my day to personally thank you for letting your pit bull loose over the 4th of July weekend.  My 3-year-old baby very much enjoyed being chased by your 75+ pound growling, snarling, teeth-baring “pet”.  My nieces, my older daughter & I were thrilled by the adventure too.  Really, nothing says excitement like sitting in a golf cart and wondering how you’re going to protect the three children with you from a very angry and very large animal.  But, it was my preschooler that took away the most from the run-in.  In fact, it made such an impression on her that she’s been reliving the whole adventure EVERY NIGHT for the last four weeks.  Good times, here…good times.  There’s nothing like waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your child scream…”MAMA!!!  The bad dogs!  The bad dogs!!! They’re under my bed…they’re going to get me with their scratchy, scratchy claws and their sharp, sharp teeth!”  And when I run to her, she is shaking in fear from the vividness of her nightmare.  I tell you, dear owners of the pit bull who live two doors down from my grandfather, this has been a defining moment for us.  I’d like to express my sincerely sarcastic appreciation…

Signed,

One Very Tired Mama